Learn more about the adoption process.
An Anonymous Letter from An Adoptive Mom to Her Parents
Adoption is hard, and sometimes it is hard in ways you didn't prepare for. Many of the adoptive families we work with at Purl spend countless hours preparing for the adoption process and life after adoption, but sometimes the obstacles post-adoption cannot be predicted no matter the education and preparation. Will your extended family welcome the child through adoption and love the child through adoption as if it were a child to whom you gave birth? In today's heartbreaking post, an anonymous Adoptive Mom shares a poignant letter to her parents after learning post-adoption that her family was not as accepting of their children as they were to other grandchildren who joined the family biologically. We hope this post helps you to analyze your entire support system as you pursue adoption and prepare for this possibility. Click here to read more.
PACA – What is a Post-Adoption Contact Agreement?
This post discusses the post-adoption contact agreement ("PACA") and its use in domestic adoption. A PACA is an agreement between the parties to the adoption and sets forth the minimum contact agreed upon by the parties and how that contact will take place. This post discusses how and when these agreements are enforceable, as well as the parties to these agreements. We also share our advice to include a written PACA in every adoption, even if it may not be enforceable in the respective state, as it can still be helpful in setting expectations amongst the parties as to the type of openness in the adoption going forward. To read more about a post adoption contact agreement or PACA, click here.
Two Open Adoptions: My Personal Experiences
In today’s blog post, Purl advisor Aubrey Cortez delves into the realm of open adoption, sharing her heartfelt personal experiences with two different open adoptions. This post is specially for prospective adoptive families, who may be contemplating their second adoption or embarking on the journey of pursuing multiple adoptions. Read more by clicking here.
The Adoption Profile: How It Is Used and How Important It Really Is
It is hard for me to often express how important I (Katie: CEO/Founder of Purl) believe the adoption profile is in a domestic adoption journey. We find that many prospective adoptive families believe this is an area they can save money in their adoption process, or they think they have some design background so they can pull it off better than a professional designer. But I find typically that families that are creating their own adoption profile, or using an inexperienced profile designer, wait much longer in their adoption journey than families that have a great profile. In this blog post, we'll explain more about how the adoption profile is used in the adoption journey, in order to explain its importance in the domestic adoption journey. Click here to read more.
Resources for Talking To Your Child About Adoption
As we have talked about more this National Adoption Awareness Month, we are trying to focus more on adoptees and how THEY feel about adoption, rather than continue to push the rosy narrative common of the adoptive parent and adoption ...
Agency vs. Direct Placement Adoptions
Did you know that there are typically two types of adoptions available in domestic adoption: agency adoptions and direct placement adoptions (often referred to as private or independent adoptions), and do you understand the differences? Do you understand when you might use one versus the other? Did you know that some states allow direct placement adoptions and some do not? Click here to learn more about the common types of domestic adoption.
Microaggressions: Supporting Adoptees and Promoting Resilience
In today's blog post, advisor Aubrey, delves into common microaggressions adoptees could experience and offers insights on how adoptive parents can proactively equip themselves and their children to navigate these experiences with grace and understanding. Click here to learn more!
Respecting Expectant Mothers: Boundaries in Adoption
In this blog post, Katie Zimmerman, founder of Purl, explores a topic that's often misunderstood: the boundaries and limitations inherent in being a prospective adoptive parent. It's crucial to understand and respect that the expectant mother holds the autonomy to decide what medical information to share and your level of involvement during her pregnancy. Knowing the difference between what you can 'expect' and what you're 'entitled to' in an adoption proceeding is vital for anyone considering the path of adoption. Click here for a comprehensive guide on how to navigate this sensitive and intricate journey.
Adoption is NOT Surrogacy
In this article, Purl Founder, Katie Zimmerman, aims to shed light on a pervasive misconception: treating adoption as if it were surrogacy. Prospective adoptive parents, particularly those looking into domestic infant adoption, must understand that the two paths are not interchangeable, particularly when it comes to interacting with expectant mothers. This article explores the key distinctions between surrogacy and adoption to equip prospective adoptive parents with the insight they need for a respectful and ethical adoption journey. Click here to read more.
Navigating Transracial Adoption
Explore the complexities of transracial adoption in today's blog post, "Navigating Transracial Adoption," authored by Ramya Gruneisen. Drawing from her personal experience as a transracial adoptee, Ramya delves into the vital aspects of this journey, offering guidance to adoptive parents and families. With a background in Public Health and a commitment to educating adoption agencies, Ramya provides unique insights on creating a supportive environment and initiating crucial conversations. Join her as she shares valuable practices, emphasizing the significance of representation, community, and empathy in this sensitive process. Click here to read more.
Giving Young Adoptees Tools to Discuss Adoption (OR NOT!)
As you may know, I (Katie - Founder/CEO) have two daughters that are only eight months apart in age. We are that cliché that everyone talks about, we discovered a very unexpected pregnancy after already being placed with our daughter through adoption. Before someone asks, it was not because we "relaxed and stopped trying and then it just happened". There was nothing relaxing about the adoption process or the adoption disruption we had around the time we must have conceived our younger daughter. But, we were very lucky to have become pregnant naturally after being unsuccessful in multiple rounds of fertility treatments, and we feel so lucky to have our two daughters. But having siblings through adoption - one adopted and one a biological child can present some unique situations and considerations for adoptive families, especially if they are close to the same age, or if they are of a different ethnicity. To read more about education that is necessary for our kids in these situations, click here.
Problems in Domestic Adoption and Purl Filling a HUGE Gap
What a week it has been! Please excuse the rant that follows as I (Katie - CEO/Founder) share some of my frustrations about the current state of the world of domestic infant adoption. Whether it be recently explaining to an agency director why I won't recommend their licensed adoption agency that routinely ships the expectant mothers they work with across lines to their "adoption friendly" state, or having to justify the work that Purl is doing as an adoption advisor in a sea of unethical adoption professionals, I'm frankly exhausted and questioning why I make the huge effort to do the work I do. Today I candidly some of my thoughts on the problems with the current state of domestic adoption and explain again what Purl is doing to fill the HUGE gaps caused by other adoption professionals. Click here to read more.
Dear Birth Father of My Child
This is a letter by an adoptive father to his daughter's birth father, who was not involved in the adoption plan and is still unknown to her adoptive family. I am a dad through adoption and the only person my daughter has known as a father. I wanted to write to you on Father’s Day to share some thoughts I have and to introduce you to the daughter you may not even know is out there. I think of you often but felt compelled this year to share with you my thoughts and feelings about our adoption and about your beautiful daughter. Click here to read more.
Trauma in Domestic Infant Adoption
We are continuing our series on the “Things I Did Wrong” in our own adoptions to help prospective adoptive parents better prepare for their own adoption journeys. Once again CEO/Founder is coming back to share more of her mistakes. This time, she’ll be sharing her mistakes in choosing infant adoption as a route to grow her family, erroneously assuming this would avoid any trauma in an adoptee, as compared to either adoption from foster care or international adoption. Click here to read more about trauma in infant adoption.
Saviorism in Adoption
Today we continue our series on “What I Did Wrong as a Prospective Adoptive Parent”. In this blog Purl Advisor, Kelcie Grace, will discuss the concept of saviorism in adoption and how prospective adoptive parents early in the adoption process often see themselves as “helping a baby in need of a loving home” and fail to grasp the complexities and trauma of adoption. To read more, click here.
Oversharing My Adoption Story
Hi there! My name is Aubrey, I am one of the Purl advisors and today I am sharing one of the biggest mistakes I made on my personal adoption journey: oversharing my child's adoption story. Parenting is hard and it's easy to get caught up in all the things we could have done better. My hope is by sharing a sliver of my story, prospective adoptive families that are just starting their journeys can learn from my mistake. Click here to read more.
Celebrating Adoption Finalization – This Gay Dad’s Perspective
If you've been following along, our CEO/Founder, Katie Zimmerman, has been doing a series surrounding the things she feels she did wrong in her domestic infant adoption journey, with the benefit of hindsight. We have gotten a lot of positive feedback from our readers and our fellow Purl Families who we have helped along the way. Daniel Duran, who adopted his daughter a few years ago with his husband with our support, sent this response to our recent post about whether we should celebrate adoption finalization days. In it, Daniel shares what celebrating adoption finalization means to him as a gay dad. We hope you enjoy this perspective and we hope this encourages you to also share your thoughts on the "mistakes" we have been discussing! Click here to read more.
Celebrating Adoption Finalization Day
We are continuing our series on "What I Did Wrong as a Prospective Adoptive Parent" with a discussion about celebrating adoption finalization day. I know this one in particular may be hard to hear for some prospective adoptive parents or adoptive parents, and you may not agree with me on it, but please hear me out. I recognize that I too celebrated my child's own adoption finalization day for years, and still acknowledge it even now due to the mistakes I made early in my own adoption journey. But I wanted to at least post about this so people consider whether it makes sense to regularly celebrate this day, particularly once your child has a better understanding of its actual meaning? Click here to read more.
An Anonymous Letter from An Adoptive Mom to Her Parents
Adoption is hard, and sometimes it is hard in ways you didn't prepare for. Many of the adoptive families we work with at Purl spend countless hours preparing for the adoption process and life after adoption, but sometimes the obstacles post-adoption cannot be predicted no matter the education and preparation. Will your extended family welcome the child through adoption and love the child through adoption as if it were a child to whom you gave birth? In today's heartbreaking post, an anonymous Adoptive Mom shares a poignant letter to her parents after learning post-adoption that her family was not as accepting of their children as they were to other grandchildren who joined the family biologically. We hope this post helps you to analyze your entire support system as you pursue adoption and prepare for this possibility. Click here to read more.
PACA – What is a Post-Adoption Contact Agreement?
This post discusses the post-adoption contact agreement ("PACA") and its use in domestic adoption. A PACA is an agreement between the parties to the adoption and sets forth the minimum contact agreed upon by the parties and how that contact will take place. This post discusses how and when these agreements are enforceable, as well as the parties to these agreements. We also share our advice to include a written PACA in every adoption, even if it may not be enforceable in the respective state, as it can still be helpful in setting expectations amongst the parties as to the type of openness in the adoption going forward. To read more about a post adoption contact agreement or PACA, click here.
Two Open Adoptions: My Personal Experiences
In today’s blog post, Purl advisor Aubrey Cortez delves into the realm of open adoption, sharing her heartfelt personal experiences with two different open adoptions. This post is specially for prospective adoptive families, who may be contemplating their second adoption or embarking on the journey of pursuing multiple adoptions. Read more by clicking here.
The Adoption Profile: How It Is Used and How Important It Really Is
It is hard for me to often express how important I (Katie: CEO/Founder of Purl) believe the adoption profile is in a domestic adoption journey. We find that many prospective adoptive families believe this is an area they can save money in their adoption process, or they think they have some design background so they can pull it off better than a professional designer. But I find typically that families that are creating their own adoption profile, or using an inexperienced profile designer, wait much longer in their adoption journey than families that have a great profile. In this blog post, we'll explain more about how the adoption profile is used in the adoption journey, in order to explain its importance in the domestic adoption journey. Click here to read more.
Resources for Talking To Your Child About Adoption
As we have talked about more this National Adoption Awareness Month, we are trying to focus more on adoptees and how THEY feel about adoption, rather than continue to push the rosy narrative common of the adoptive parent and adoption ...
Agency vs. Direct Placement Adoptions
Did you know that there are typically two types of adoptions available in domestic adoption: agency adoptions and direct placement adoptions (often referred to as private or independent adoptions), and do you understand the differences? Do you understand when you might use one versus the other? Did you know that some states allow direct placement adoptions and some do not? Click here to learn more about the common types of domestic adoption.
Microaggressions: Supporting Adoptees and Promoting Resilience
In today's blog post, advisor Aubrey, delves into common microaggressions adoptees could experience and offers insights on how adoptive parents can proactively equip themselves and their children to navigate these experiences with grace and understanding. Click here to learn more!
Respecting Expectant Mothers: Boundaries in Adoption
In this blog post, Katie Zimmerman, founder of Purl, explores a topic that's often misunderstood: the boundaries and limitations inherent in being a prospective adoptive parent. It's crucial to understand and respect that the expectant mother holds the autonomy to decide what medical information to share and your level of involvement during her pregnancy. Knowing the difference between what you can 'expect' and what you're 'entitled to' in an adoption proceeding is vital for anyone considering the path of adoption. Click here for a comprehensive guide on how to navigate this sensitive and intricate journey.
Adoption is NOT Surrogacy
In this article, Purl Founder, Katie Zimmerman, aims to shed light on a pervasive misconception: treating adoption as if it were surrogacy. Prospective adoptive parents, particularly those looking into domestic infant adoption, must understand that the two paths are not interchangeable, particularly when it comes to interacting with expectant mothers. This article explores the key distinctions between surrogacy and adoption to equip prospective adoptive parents with the insight they need for a respectful and ethical adoption journey. Click here to read more.
Navigating Transracial Adoption
Explore the complexities of transracial adoption in today's blog post, "Navigating Transracial Adoption," authored by Ramya Gruneisen. Drawing from her personal experience as a transracial adoptee, Ramya delves into the vital aspects of this journey, offering guidance to adoptive parents and families. With a background in Public Health and a commitment to educating adoption agencies, Ramya provides unique insights on creating a supportive environment and initiating crucial conversations. Join her as she shares valuable practices, emphasizing the significance of representation, community, and empathy in this sensitive process. Click here to read more.
Giving Young Adoptees Tools to Discuss Adoption (OR NOT!)
As you may know, I (Katie - Founder/CEO) have two daughters that are only eight months apart in age. We are that cliché that everyone talks about, we discovered a very unexpected pregnancy after already being placed with our daughter through adoption. Before someone asks, it was not because we "relaxed and stopped trying and then it just happened". There was nothing relaxing about the adoption process or the adoption disruption we had around the time we must have conceived our younger daughter. But, we were very lucky to have become pregnant naturally after being unsuccessful in multiple rounds of fertility treatments, and we feel so lucky to have our two daughters. But having siblings through adoption - one adopted and one a biological child can present some unique situations and considerations for adoptive families, especially if they are close to the same age, or if they are of a different ethnicity. To read more about education that is necessary for our kids in these situations, click here.
Problems in Domestic Adoption and Purl Filling a HUGE Gap
What a week it has been! Please excuse the rant that follows as I (Katie - CEO/Founder) share some of my frustrations about the current state of the world of domestic infant adoption. Whether it be recently explaining to an agency director why I won't recommend their licensed adoption agency that routinely ships the expectant mothers they work with across lines to their "adoption friendly" state, or having to justify the work that Purl is doing as an adoption advisor in a sea of unethical adoption professionals, I'm frankly exhausted and questioning why I make the huge effort to do the work I do. Today I candidly some of my thoughts on the problems with the current state of domestic adoption and explain again what Purl is doing to fill the HUGE gaps caused by other adoption professionals. Click here to read more.
Dear Birth Father of My Child
This is a letter by an adoptive father to his daughter's birth father, who was not involved in the adoption plan and is still unknown to her adoptive family. I am a dad through adoption and the only person my daughter has known as a father. I wanted to write to you on Father’s Day to share some thoughts I have and to introduce you to the daughter you may not even know is out there. I think of you often but felt compelled this year to share with you my thoughts and feelings about our adoption and about your beautiful daughter. Click here to read more.
Trauma in Domestic Infant Adoption
We are continuing our series on the “Things I Did Wrong” in our own adoptions to help prospective adoptive parents better prepare for their own adoption journeys. Once again CEO/Founder is coming back to share more of her mistakes. This time, she’ll be sharing her mistakes in choosing infant adoption as a route to grow her family, erroneously assuming this would avoid any trauma in an adoptee, as compared to either adoption from foster care or international adoption. Click here to read more about trauma in infant adoption.
Saviorism in Adoption
Today we continue our series on “What I Did Wrong as a Prospective Adoptive Parent”. In this blog Purl Advisor, Kelcie Grace, will discuss the concept of saviorism in adoption and how prospective adoptive parents early in the adoption process often see themselves as “helping a baby in need of a loving home” and fail to grasp the complexities and trauma of adoption. To read more, click here.
Oversharing My Adoption Story
Hi there! My name is Aubrey, I am one of the Purl advisors and today I am sharing one of the biggest mistakes I made on my personal adoption journey: oversharing my child's adoption story. Parenting is hard and it's easy to get caught up in all the things we could have done better. My hope is by sharing a sliver of my story, prospective adoptive families that are just starting their journeys can learn from my mistake. Click here to read more.
Celebrating Adoption Finalization – This Gay Dad’s Perspective
If you've been following along, our CEO/Founder, Katie Zimmerman, has been doing a series surrounding the things she feels she did wrong in her domestic infant adoption journey, with the benefit of hindsight. We have gotten a lot of positive feedback from our readers and our fellow Purl Families who we have helped along the way. Daniel Duran, who adopted his daughter a few years ago with his husband with our support, sent this response to our recent post about whether we should celebrate adoption finalization days. In it, Daniel shares what celebrating adoption finalization means to him as a gay dad. We hope you enjoy this perspective and we hope this encourages you to also share your thoughts on the "mistakes" we have been discussing! Click here to read more.
Celebrating Adoption Finalization Day
We are continuing our series on "What I Did Wrong as a Prospective Adoptive Parent" with a discussion about celebrating adoption finalization day. I know this one in particular may be hard to hear for some prospective adoptive parents or adoptive parents, and you may not agree with me on it, but please hear me out. I recognize that I too celebrated my child's own adoption finalization day for years, and still acknowledge it even now due to the mistakes I made early in my own adoption journey. But I wanted to at least post about this so people consider whether it makes sense to regularly celebrate this day, particularly once your child has a better understanding of its actual meaning? Click here to read more.
