Adoption Disruption

Fall and My Thoughts on Disrupted Adoptions Today

2023-02-21T11:59:16-07:00October 10, 2022|Adoption Disruption, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Hoping to Adopt, Learn|

Fall always used to be my (Katie, CEO/Founder of Purl's) favorite month. The weather changing, football, pumpkins, the start of the holiday season. But fall started to have a different feel for me 7 years ago as my husband and I began our personal adoption journey. We had been matched almost immediately after completing our home study with an expectant mom due with a baby boy in October. Even as a very unprepared adoptive parent ,I did know there was a possibility he wouldn’t end up being ours. But I was pretty clueless and even had a feeling of entitlement over that baby because we had been chosen, we had spent a lot of time with the expectant mom and had been paying living expenses for the expectant mom during the course of that pregnancy, and maybe even not so subconsciously I believed we would give this child a better life than this expectant mom could provide. Click here to read more about my thoughts on disrupted adoptions now.

It’s not about you…and you will likely be uncomfortable

2022-03-31T10:02:00-07:00June 10, 2021|Adoption Disruption, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Perspectives, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Hoping to Adopt, Infertility, Transracial Adoption (Learn)|

If you’re starting the adoption journey you might not realize that the rest of this journey WILL NOT be about you. You might have endured a lot of pain to get here, infertility, failed IUI or IVF cycles, failed embryo adoption or surrogacy. Really, really tough stuff. But I’m going to tell you something difficult to hear, most likely if you are here now and pursuing domestic infant adoption: your mindset will now have to immediately shift and all your decisions from here need to be about your future child through adoption (the adoptee) and what is best for them. You need to be able to justify every decision you make, and feel comfortable telling your future child the decisions you made and steps you took to adopt. To read more, click here.


2022-04-01T07:26:24-07:00March 1, 2021|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Disruption, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Perspectives, Domestic infant adoption, Hoping to Adopt, Infertility, Open Adoption (Learn)|

This blog post discusses the term “selfish” and how that is often used in the context of domestic infant adoption. It discusses an episode of the teen drama All American and an adoption story in one of the show’s characters and my reaction after watching a scene involving a potential adoption disruption, or a closed adoption that turns open after the birth mother changes her mind. Click here to read more.

The Adoption Baby Shower Dilemma

2022-04-01T14:46:03-07:00October 21, 2020|Adoption Disruption, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Hoping to Adopt|

Adoption changes the way in which parents prepare for a child. When you are preparing to have a child biologically, you typically have 9 months to think about your registry, what you might need, and time for friends and family to offer to throw you a baby shower where you get many of the items you might need to bring home a new baby. If you are adding to your family through domestic infant adoption, many prospective adoptive parents struggle with whether and when it is appropriate to have a baby shower, but at the same time they could really use the baby items and the support from friends and family before they take home their child. So, I do think prospective adoptive parents should consider having an adoption baby shower, but I think the timing of that shower is really important. Click here to learn more.

Adoption Disruption: An Interview

2022-04-01T15:13:07-07:00June 26, 2020|Adoption Disruption, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Perspectives, Adoption Process|

When families decide to take the leap with a domestic infant adoption, one of the most vulnerable moments as a prospective adoptive parent is waiting for the child’s birth parent to sign the consents to the adoption, otherwise known as relinquishments, typically done a few days after the birth of the child. Many parents considering an adoption plan for their child feel that confirmation to continue with the adoption plan postpartum, while others do decide to parent their child, leading to what is commonly called a “disrupted adoption”. “Michelle,” her husband and her two older children walked through a disrupted adoption and are now on the other side. She shares their story, in the hopes that others walking through the similar pains of a disrupted adoption would find comfort, as well as to share how her older children processed the complicated nature of adoption loss.

Surviving a “Disrupted Adoption”

2022-04-08T10:52:46-07:00October 11, 2018|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Disruption, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard|

October had always been one of my favorite months of the year. Living in Arizona, it is usually the first sign of cooler weather, football is in full swing and my three favorite holidays are on the horizon. When my husband and I were home study approved and certified to adopt in early August, we were quickly matched with an expectant mother due with a baby boy in mid-October. I was so excited about that being the month we would become parents. I purchased the cutest little bear Halloween costume for him and was thrilled to begin to get to know the expectant mother that would become our son’s birth mother. I couldn’t have predicted that on October 7 a sweet baby boy would be born, but by October 10, after cuddling him for days in the hospital, I would be one of so many in the adoption world to experience what is commonly called a “failed adoption.”

Our Founder’s Personal Adoption Journey

2022-04-01T17:40:15-07:00September 15, 2017|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Disruption, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Perspectives, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Infertility, Open Adoption (Learn)|

My own adoption story is relatively short as far as time… we took home our daughter within six months of being certified to adopt… but it was not without its fair share of drama. Fortunately, it ends with the most perfect child becoming a permanent part of our family.

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