Adoption Process Archives

An Anonymous Letter from An Adoptive Mom to Her Parents

Katie Zimmerman2024-03-13T09:03:29-07:00March 13, 2024|Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Perspectives, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Hoping to Adopt, Infertility, Learn|

Adoption is hard, and sometimes it is hard in ways you didn't prepare for. Many of the adoptive families we work with at Purl spend countless hours preparing for the adoption process and life after adoption, but sometimes the obstacles post-adoption cannot be predicted no matter the education and preparation. Will your extended family welcome the child through adoption and love the child through adoption as if it were a child to whom you gave birth? In today's heartbreaking post, an anonymous Adoptive Mom shares a poignant letter to her parents after learning post-adoption that her family was not as accepting of their children as they were to other grandchildren who joined the family biologically. We hope this post helps you to analyze your entire support system as you pursue adoption and prepare for this possibility. Click here to read more.

PACA – What is a Post-Adoption Contact Agreement?

Katie Zimmerman2024-03-05T18:00:05-07:00March 5, 2024|Adoption Education, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Hoping to Adopt, Learn, Open Adoption (Learn)|

This post discusses the post-adoption contact agreement ("PACA") and its use in domestic adoption. A PACA is an agreement between the parties to the adoption and sets forth the minimum contact agreed upon by the parties and how that contact will take place. This post discusses how and when these agreements are enforceable, as well as the parties to these agreements. We also share our advice to include a written PACA in every adoption, even if it may not be enforceable in the respective state, as it can still be helpful in setting expectations amongst the parties as to the type of openness in the adoption going forward. To read more about a post adoption contact agreement or PACA, click here.

Agency vs. Direct Placement Adoptions

Janae Peterson2023-11-13T14:06:43-07:00November 13, 2023|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Education, Adoption Outreach, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Funding Your Adoption, Hoping to Adopt, Learn|

Did you know that there are typically two types of adoptions available in domestic adoption: agency adoptions and direct placement adoptions (often referred to as private or independent adoptions), and do you understand the differences? Do you understand when you might use one versus the other? Did you know that some states allow direct placement adoptions and some do not? Click here to learn more about the common types of domestic adoption.

Respecting Expectant Mothers: Boundaries in Adoption

Kelcie Grace Germano2023-09-15T12:42:28-07:00September 15, 2023|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Drug/Alcohol Exposure, Hoping to Adopt, Learn|

In this blog post, Katie Zimmerman, founder of Purl, explores a topic that's often misunderstood: the boundaries and limitations inherent in being a prospective adoptive parent. It's crucial to understand and respect that the expectant mother holds the autonomy to decide what medical information to share and your level of involvement during her pregnancy. Knowing the difference between what you can 'expect' and what you're 'entitled to' in an adoption proceeding is vital for anyone considering the path of adoption. Click here for a comprehensive guide on how to navigate this sensitive and intricate journey.

Adoption is NOT Surrogacy

Kelcie Grace Germano2023-09-15T13:02:50-07:00September 14, 2023|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Perspectives, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Drug/Alcohol Exposure, Embryo Donation/Adoption, Hoping to Adopt, Infertility, Learn|

In this article, Purl Founder, Katie Zimmerman, aims to shed light on a pervasive misconception: treating adoption as if it were surrogacy. Prospective adoptive parents, particularly those looking into domestic infant adoption, must understand that the two paths are not interchangeable, particularly when it comes to interacting with expectant mothers. This article explores the key distinctions between surrogacy and adoption to equip prospective adoptive parents with the insight they need for a respectful and ethical adoption journey. Click here to read more.

Problems in Domestic Adoption and Purl Filling a HUGE Gap

Katie Zimmerman2023-07-10T09:53:17-07:00July 8, 2023|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Outreach, Adoption Perspectives, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Hoping to Adopt, Learn, Open Adoption (Learn)|

What a week it has been! Please excuse the rant that follows as I (Katie - CEO/Founder) share some of my frustrations about the current state of the world of domestic infant adoption. Whether it be recently explaining to an agency director why I won't recommend their licensed adoption agency that routinely ships the expectant mothers they work with across lines to their "adoption friendly" state, or having to justify the work that Purl is doing as an adoption advisor in a sea of unethical adoption professionals, I'm frankly exhausted and questioning why I make the huge effort to do the work I do. Today I candidly some of my thoughts on the problems with the current state of domestic adoption and explain again what Purl is doing to fill the HUGE gaps caused by other adoption professionals. Click here to read more.

Saviorism in Adoption

Kelcie Grace Germano2023-06-09T09:20:10-07:00June 1, 2023|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Perspectives, Adoption Process, Hoping to Adopt, Learn|

Today we continue our series on “What I Did Wrong as a Prospective Adoptive Parent”. In this blog Purl Advisor, Kelcie Grace, will discuss the concept of saviorism in adoption and how prospective adoptive parents early in the adoption process often see themselves as “helping a baby in need of a loving home” and fail to grasp the complexities and trauma of adoption. To read more, click here.

Celebrating Adoption Finalization Day

Katie Zimmerman2023-05-21T16:01:22-07:00May 18, 2023|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Perspectives, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Learn, Open Adoption (Learn)|

We are continuing our series on "What I Did Wrong as a Prospective Adoptive Parent" with a discussion about celebrating adoption finalization day. I know this one in particular may be hard to hear for some prospective adoptive parents or adoptive parents, and you may not agree with me on it, but please hear me out. I recognize that I too celebrated my child's own adoption finalization day for years, and still acknowledge it even now due to the mistakes I made early in my own adoption journey. But I wanted to at least post about this so people consider whether it makes sense to regularly celebrate this day, particularly once your child has a better understanding of its actual meaning? Click here to read more.

Insecurity About “Mom” and Fears About Open Adoption

Katie Zimmerman2023-05-21T16:02:22-07:00May 17, 2023|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Perspectives, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption, Open Adoption (Learn), Uncategorized|

As Mother's Day approached, I (Katie - CEO/Founder of Purl) tried unsuccessfully to get this blog post up. Because Mother's Day is complicated for so many people, including those touched by adoption. I struggled to organize my thoughts about my own insecurity with my own motherhood through adoption and how that related to my fears of open adoption. While it has been relatively easy for me to share my other mistakes in my adoption journey, this was one area that was especially hard for me. Maybe it was due to embarrassment, but after the 10th draft, here are my still scrambled thoughts... The mistake I'm discussing today centered around my own insecurity about the role of "Mother", and how that impacted my adoption journey and even the early years of my child's open adoption. Click here to read more.

Naming An Adopted Child

Katie Zimmerman2023-05-21T16:00:21-07:00May 9, 2023|Adoption Advisor, Adoption Education, Adoption is Hard, Adoption Process, Domestic infant adoption|

One area I (Katie - CEO/Founder of Purl) went wrong as a prospective adoptive parent was my thoughts and process on naming an adopted child. My perspective at the time of our adoption journey was that this was going to be my child and I should get to name my child. The adoption professionals we worked with didn’t give me any education on this area, and instead said the name the expectant mother gave the child didn’t really matter because we could change the name after finalization. Click on this link to read more about how dramatically my opinion has changed about the right and privilege to name a child, as well as a discussion as to how the issuance of the birth certificate works in an adoption setting, and what impact that has on adoptees' ability to secure a copy of their birth certificate later on.

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